Yes, I'm back to blogging, although I won't make any promises that this will be a regular thing for me. It always amazes me how many things I have floating around in my head that I would love to do, but then the business of life seems to take over and there is never enough time during waking hours to make those ideas a reality. I originally started this blog as a way to keep close friends and family aware of how the boys were doing during those dark surgery days, but in recent weeks something very strange has happened. I have been approached by people at soccer games, parent conferences, and even the grocery store asking me how the kids are doing and mentioning that they used to follow this blog. This came a quite a shock to me. I didn't think that anyone was paying attention...I guess I was wrong.
To say that this has been a trying start to the school year would be an understatement. Marc has been totally buried in his most difficult semester of law school to date and I have been on my own with the kids more than ever. Physically he is absent from our home at least three nights a week (often more due to work) and he is mentally absent from us during the short spurts of time that he is here. The amount of reading that he has to do is intense and I spend his "no school nights" just trying to keep the household as quiet as possible. The logistics of getting all of the kids where they need to be, maintaining the household, planning for holidays, and (most importantly) giving everyone the time that they deserve has been a challenge for me. Needless to say, after nearly a decade of eliminating caffeine from my diet, it's become a new staple out of necessity!
I have made it my mission however, to ensure that the kids do not have to pay for decisions that have been made regarding work and school. After all, it's not their fault that Daddy is away a lot, just as it is not their fault that I work full time. Each child is as fully involved in extracurricular activities as they choose to be and, although it makes for a head-spinningly crazy schedule for me, watching them thrive is so worth the logistical nightmare! So, here's the rundown...Abby is involved in Drama Club, band, Builders Club, CCD, Youth Group, swim lessons and student government. Hailey is taking Hip Hop Dance, Soccer, CCD and swim lessons. Jacob is also taking swim lessons, CCD, and Cub Scouts. The girls will start ski lessons shortly after the holidays and both Hailey and Jacob are hoping to enroll in art lessons again in January. Zachary, for now enjoys music therapy at school and has not shown any interest in doing anything more than his school day activities during the school year. He does however, enjoy helping Abby and I cook whenever possible...and of course he loves to make little movies for us on the Ipad!
Health-wise the kids are doing wonderfully! The boys have made full recoveries. Zach has not yet returned to his toe walking and no longer needs to wear his braces. After the holidays, we will probably have to re-visit the braces issue though to ensure that we keep making progress. The fear is that his muscles could tighten up again down the road, so we are hoping to have him wear his new braces only at night. I get why this needs to happen, but unfortunately his stubbornness about wearing things on his feet at night will necessitate my staying awake until he falls asleep to then putting the braces on him...this could mean that I need to stay up until midnight (on those frequent "can't settle down" nights) to do this while also needing to get up at 4:30am for work each day. I will do it willingly, but it is going to be rough (my apologies already for any of my co-workers who will need to deal with me on those tough mornings!).
Jacob is also recovering well physically. He had a pretty rough transition to school, based in his severe separation anxiety / abandonment issues that he struggles with. This was the first year, since he has joined our family, that he did not travel with me in the mornings to get to school. This surfaced a whole slew of issues stirring up nightmares, behavior issues, and very emotional tantrums. I don't know that I will ever be able to convince that child that I will never leave him...he breaks my heart. Due to finally being full time in a public school though, we were able to have him properly evaluated and he can now start receiving the speech, OT, and teaching modifications that he needs. We finally have a better understanding of exactly what kind of damage has been done to his brain and spine, making working with him much easier. The past couple of weeks have been much better for him, so I am hopeful that the worst of this transition is over for now.
So where do I hope to take this blog? In recent months I have encountered everything from people staring and whispering about the kids and I as they witness our unique situation in public, to people calling our family "inspiring". I have had many who promised to stand by us for support abandon us and I have had unlikely individuals surface when I needed them most. I have questioned whether or not I am a good mom and worried that my marriage will buckle under the pressure of it all. Put all of those things together and out comes a blog that I hope will give those who read it a glimpse into my own personal reality. One which statistically should already be in shambles, but has managed to survive. One that reeks havoc on me physically. One that has caused social isolation at work and at home. One that few truly understand, though they claim to be able to. But one that is made up of four little people that have made me the luckiest woman on earth!
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